{"id":544,"date":"2017-08-21T18:14:02","date_gmt":"2017-08-21T18:14:02","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/pfauerbachtherapy.com\/?p=544"},"modified":"2023-06-22T02:31:11","modified_gmt":"2023-06-22T02:31:11","slug":"so-she-wants-to-talk-6-listening-skills-to-help-you-hear-her","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/pfauerbachtherapy.com\/so-she-wants-to-talk-6-listening-skills-to-help-you-hear-her\/","title":{"rendered":"So, She Wants to Talk…6 Listening skills to Help You Hear Her"},"content":{"rendered":"
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Your partner wants to have a conversation with you, but do you know the right listening skills? Knowing how to listen not only means understanding what she says. It also communicates your feelings and investment in the relationship. Read on to learn more about effective listening.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #1: Eye Contact<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Making eye contact sounds like such as basic concept. If you live in the Western Hemisphere, you have most likely been taught to make eye contact with whom you are speaking. It is still an important point to remember when having serious discussions with your partner. Remember though, that eye contact doesn\u2019t mean staring into their eyeballs! It should be a natural part of your interactions with your partner.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #2: Be Present<\/strong><\/h3>\n

In our modern world, we have some many distractions that break our concentration or steer our attention away from our partners. Granted phones, television, radios, and music players have been around in one form or another for many years (remember cassette tapes?), but the biggest culprit that exists today for distraction is the cell phone. It is so easy to get pulled away by a text message, a social media post, \u00a0a video, or our favorite music. This means that:<\/p>\n

\u2022 You are less inclined to want to talk to your partner as it will pull you away from your phone.\"listening<\/a><\/p>\n

\u2022 You will be tempted to read or reply to a message that comes in.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Your partner, in turn, will become more frustrated with you, damaging not just the conversation, but the relationship too.<\/p>\n

She wants to know that you care about what she has to say. So do both of you a favor by turning off your phone and being present.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #3: Don\u2019t Be Defensive!<\/strong><\/h3>\n

Sometimes it\u2019s hard to hear what the other person has to say, even if we love them. We may not like hearing hard feedback or criticism. So, we react by interrupting, arguing, or blaming our partner. It may be hard, but restrain yourself from becoming defensive. Try to see things from her point of view and her feelings.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #4: Ask for Clarification<\/strong><\/h3>\n

When she does make a point that you find confusing, ask her to clarify. For instance, if she says that you never help out at home, ask if she has any examples. If she says she asked you yesterday to take out the trash and you forgot, that can help you to see things from her perspective. Again, this may not be easy, but it can help you to connect with your partner and understand where she is coming from.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #5: Acknowledge What Was Said<\/strong><\/h3>\n

We all want to be heard and understood. When your partner has finished or paused, take a moment to summarize back what she said. You don\u2019t have to sound like a robot, but being able to say back to her what was said helps in two ways:<\/p>\n

\u2022 Allows you another opportunity to understand where she is coming from.<\/p>\n

\u2022 Acknowledges to her that you were listening and are internalizing what she said.<\/p>\n

Listening Skills #6: Ask How to Move Forward<\/strong><\/h3>\n

At the end of the discussion, ask how you can move forward from the conversation. In many cases, all that was needed was time for her to talk and you to listen. Nothing more needs to happen afterward. In other cases, she may be asking you to change a behavior or have more awareness of your actions. Start the dialogue for solving the problem in a way that gets both of your needs met.<\/p>\n

Unfortunately, we are not born with top-notch listening skills. Rather, listening can take a lifetime and a lot of trial-and-error to master. However, if you are struggling with, consider talking to a therapist. He or she can help you\u00a0improve your listening skills and enhance the way you and your partner communicate you care.<\/p>\n

If you’re interesting in learning more about communication skills in a relationship, visit Phil Fauerbach’s Relationship Counseling for Men<\/a> page or contact Philip to\u00a0schedule an appointment at (813) 759-3278<\/a>.<\/span><\/p>\n<\/section>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Your partner wants to have a conversation with you, but do you know the right listening skills? Knowing how to listen not only means understanding what she says. It also communicates your feelings and investment in the relationship. Read on to learn more about effective listening. Listening Skills #1: Eye Contact Making eye contact sounds […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":202,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[6],"tags":[],"yoast_head":"\n6 Listening Skills to Help You Hear Her When She Wants to Talk<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Listening skills can be one of the best gifts you give your partner. 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